Faceoff - Is March Irrelivant?

Yes

Miles Ulinfun, staff writer

March is such an underwhelming and boring month; nothing big goes on in it. December has Christmas and winter break, January is the start of the new year, February is Valentine’s Day, but if I were to ask you how excited you were for March, unless it was the birthday or anniversary of you or someone you knew, you probably wouldn’t think too much about it. 

The only major holiday in March is St. Patrick’s Day, but no one in America even knows the history behind the first one, they just wear green (as if they don't on any other day) and go around harassing people who don't want to wear green. March is the only month to not have some sort of seasonal advertisement. This is a small take on American capitalism, but for months like December or June-July you have ads tailored to those months(Christmas and summer ads). Yet, March doesn't have those kinds of ads; there's nothing to capitalize on. 

 “It’s pretty irrelevant because it has no major events unless it is a birthday, which is rare in itself, and also kind of there for a show. Then again, important events can be happening elsewhere,” says sophomore Keira Ramirez. 

“Oh, but Miles, my birthday is in March, so it’s automatically the best month.” Some might say. Oh yes, it is, for you (and your loved ones)! Just because it’s your birth month doesn’t mean the month is all that special to the general public. Take me for example, my birthday is Oct.18 (it’d be nice if more people remembered), but the month itself is quite mediocre, since Halloween is the very last day of the month. But at least it has Halloween.  

When making a ranking of anything, the thing at the very bottom doesn’t always mean it’s absolutely terrible. It just means it’s not as good as the others, and that’s what’s going on in March. March is the start of spring but even that doesn’t really mean much as Spring Break is the start of April, so when people think of spring, they think of April and not March.  Plus, summer and autumn are just better. 

When discussing my thoughts with my friends, they looked at me like I was stupid. I am not stupid, and brought up August as a worse month, and that is a fair point. August is quite uninteresting outside of back-to-school season, but who cares about that. I almost agreed with them, until I did research! August was named after King Augustus-flipping-Caesar, the man responsible for arguably the best struggle dish and military conquests, but people care more about the pizza chain. National Aviation Day is on Aug. 19, and since my friend Jackson Huynh is the head of the school’s Aviation club (and I am a member), that automatically makes the month better than March. National Spiderman day on Aug. 1, so think about it, Spiderman! Is this even a discussion anymore? Honestly, I could write a 500-word article on Spiderman alone. 

March can honestly do better. It's an overall lackluster month with not much going on compared to the other months, unless a personal celebration falls in that month its pretty forgettable. 

No

Eli Kim, design editor

My name is Eli Kim and my birthday is March 15, 2009. So, like many people you know, I was born in March. Which is why I take great offense to this "face-off" being presented as an idea to me in the first place. Because personally, I think me being born is at least somewhat relevant. Or The Chariot would lose my epic design skills and just general all-round awesomeness.  

Everyone loves women. Women’s History month is actually in March, as well as Women’s History week and International Women’s Day; if you do not like March, you hate women (which is bad). This important declaration goes back all the way to 1980, where women’s groups and historians lobbying lead to President Carter “[issuing] the first Presidential Proclamation declaring the Week of March 8, 1980 as National Women’s History Week”, according to Women’s History. Subsequent presidents upheld this proclamation and Congress passed Public Law 100-9, officially naming March Women’s History month. There are also many other celebrations of inclusion during this month: Developmental Disabilities Awareness Month , Greek-American Heritage Month, Irish American Heritage Month, etc. March is a month of inclusivity and awesomeness, and if you don’t like it, you aren’t very inclusive and therefore not awesome. 

March 15 (or the Ides of March) is specifically the date of Julius Caeser’s assassination and, in turn, the rise of the Roman Empire. Ignoring all the horrible things the Roman Empire did, it's pretty cool. Having one of the biggest military advancements ever, having the most conquered land in history and gladiators (literally our school logo)! Imagine being in ancient Rome and celebrating March while eating a bunch of grapes and watching some gladiators fight. Also, it has its own show on Prime. If that's not cool, then literally nothing is cool, ever. 

Even if you don’t care about me (which is sad), there are plenty of other celebrities that are born in March that you hopefully care about. Justin Bieber, Shaquille O'Neal, Bon Jovi, Bryan Cranston, Lady Gaga, Bhad Bhabie and even more yet to be born! Also, even if you don’t care about these alive people, lots of important historical figures were born in March. Elizabeth Barrett Browning, Gabriel Garcia Marquez, Harry Houdini, Albert Eistein, Mr. Rogers, Bach and probably more! (interview a teacher people like who’s born in March). 

Now, I am just now realizing that my entire argument just completely collapses by pointing out the simple fact that if March did not exist then all these important things that happened in March could have just easily occurred in any other month. But then, is any month truly relevant? Shouldn’t the emphasis be put on the actual people and events that have facilitated such importance instead of what month they just so happened to happen in? Nope. I’d argue that we should just collapse all the months into March, and have every year be named “March 1, March 2, March 3, etc.” That way, there is no confusion on whether months are relevant or not. Then every month will be the most relevant one of them all: March!